Santa Claus Rattled By Poor Economy, Major Cutbacks Likely

The economic woes have reached many around the world, but they extend far and wide all around the North Pole, as Santa Claus himself is feeling the heat from the stormy climate. It appears that this might be a leaner season for all of the little boys and girls around the world, but Santa vows that he will do his best as he prepares to meet the holiday demand in the matter of hours before he goes on his insane rush around the globe.

It has been a rough year for CringleCo, the largest manufacturing company of Christmas products around the entire world, based in the North Pole. Pressure from stock holders have maybe said now is the time for Santa Claus to step down and allow someone else take the reigns, but the grizzled veteran of Christmas refuses to go down without a fight, saying that he’d rather be pushing up mistletoe than give up the business he built.

Mass elf layoffs have plagued the holiday season and the occupy North Pole movement has put a strain on Santa Claus, but the jolliest elf of them all refuses to let it all get down. The spirit of Christmas lives on through the truest and most innocent of all force, the children around the world, the one force that does not seem to be tainted by all of the multitude of problems of the world.

It does appear to be a rather grey and dismal Christmas for many around the world. Santa reminds us all that the greatest resource of all is each other and Christmas is a time where we can all put aside our differences and be together, even if it is highly likely that it will be business as usual on December 26^th.

Santa and his remaining employees have been working around the clock to meet the rush. Rumors that Santa Claus has used Ebay to buy old toys while passing off them as new have been unfounded rumors, likely malicious spread by rivals of Santa Claus, so they can take up the Christmas racket.

Sadly it does appear that if things continue to spiral down on this rate, Santa will have to downsize his reindeer team to only six. Dancer and Vixen seem to be the two most likely candidates to be cut, due to their poor work ethic and lack of motivation. Rumors have remained unconfirmed about whether he’ll outsource work to another race like dwarves who work for cheaper but make lower quality toys.

Santa Claus could not be reached for comment on the rumors that he may have to file for bankruptcy.